I'm a little confused about religion?

Ok I was born into Christianity my mother is deep into church and I've bicaly been surounded by it my whole life. But I'm at that point in my life where I'm starting to ask questions, spiritual questions. I crave the truth. I don't want to walk through life blinded and deluded. And this isn't something that just came up last night. I've been questioning religion for the last two years. I've prayed to god to guide me in his steps and make things clear for me. And I haven't got a clear sighn that I'm looking for. I've never had a supernatural experience of any type. I'm not saying I have to see an angel in order to have clarity but things just aren't making sense. I read the bible and anybody any smart open minded human can understand that there are some major contradictions in scripture. I don't have time to list them all because there are so many ways god contradicts himself. I personnally think that man has totally screwed up on translating the bible. And all the murder that goes on in the bible for the better of the kingdom of god? Really? Sometimes I litteraly reD the bible and in mid sentence I'm like "wait what?". I'm reading up on the history of religion and it's obvious Jesus could possibly be a made up guy. And with so many religions out there and then the idea of a hell to be tortured if you don't pray to one certain man? Even my mother uses the lords name in vain. And the bible says to not go by your own understanding but to believe 100% that every word of the bible is true becnause it's gods word. And if I tell my parents Im taking a step back from e everything having to do with religion they will think it's the devil or I haven't found "the light". And another thing.. The main reason I followed Jesus is because I had a fear of hell and I don't want to believe in something out of fear. Honestly I can't say I'm done with religion for the rest of my life but I don't wan any more games I want truth. So I'm going to step out of the religion bubble for a while and learn things for myself instead of blindly following "faith".